Thursday, September 28, 2017

Show, Don't Tell - Character Descriptions

We have been learning to show, not tell in their writing.

Here are some of their character descriptions where they are focusing on show,  not tell.

The ibes-fen-cra-phant-tortoise
It is an ugly sight. A tortoise like back and elephant legs make me scared. And I won't forget the giant, black spiky snippers as pointy as the eiffel tower! As big as a baby at least. The enormous goat horns made me shiver! His face is so black he looks red! He is as short as a leprechaun but is quite bulky. His ears are as big as stones.
By Alex

The bis-cra-at-lion
Up flew the creature,she has grey shiny wings that show her black veins. As she flies around outside while the wind blows furiously,you could see her sizeable grey snippers stealing babies lollipops.She has horns as massive as a cow ,also light brown curly hair that is as short as a mouse's tail.As she walks down the street everyone is scared of her yellow and brown tail she just crossed the road and she went home and had a nap.
By Ane

The Bis-conda-cra-elly-ondor-stingray

The sight was out of the ordinary. It had a long pink slithery tongue sticking out of the mouth, claws as pointy as a blade and it’s hard shell around it. It had smooth white horns. I tried to look away but it was too amazing too. I had to do something about this ugly creature. It had blue slimy jellyfish legs floating across the sea I looked behind it and saw it’s mutated wings barfing out his back. He had a sharp wobbly barb on his back that frightened me to death. I knew I had to go after that.

By Barron
By Ala

It was a good day and I was hiking but all of a sudden I got pulled in a cave. I could not help but notice his huge black pointy nipers that are spiky all over. Right away I knew he was a friendly creature, he only pulled me into the cave because an arrow was heading towards me. He had a regular head and hair but silver shiny horns. He also had huge black wings that blocked the sun coming into the cave but he had blue seahorse legs but he hovered with the wings. With the seahorse legs I  imagined that he could also swim through the water like a mermaid. He turned a round and I noticed he had a long scaley rough tail like a crocodile.
By Ryan